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11 October 2005

No, This Post Isn't About Last Night's Exhibition Game

It’s Allen Iverson’s fault. Seriously. You see I had him at #10 in the silly, everyone-in-their-right-mind-knew-we-wouldn’t-finish list that The Guamish and I (feebly) started during the off season. The short, short off season. Has Manu’s thigh bruise even heeled yet?

Now I know what my six regular readers are thinking. “Wait a second. This is the same guy that suckles at the teat that is Manu Ginobili’s PPFGA? How can he possibly have Iverson that high?” In the end, I just couldn’t do it; stopped half way through the post. Couldn’t get past the gaudy FGA numbers and his recent frailty.

Don’t get me wrong. I love AI as a basketball player. Unfortunately, being a good basketball player and being a good NBA basketball player are not one in the same. Scoop Jackson said as much in one of his first columns for ESPN.com.

I believe Allen Iverson is the best player in the game.

I believe Tim Duncan, Kevin Garnett, Kobe Bryant and LeBron James are better than him.

Watching Iverson makes me want to play ball again; scrounges up memories of intramural games in college. Not because I ever played with anyone with 1/10th the talent as The Answer (though I *think* I once got alley-ooped on by Michael “Shitty” Schmidt). But I have been schooled by guys with good cross-overs and smooth pull-up jumpers in the lane; players with basketball skills that could theoretically extrapolate out to what Iverson has. His game at least translates to what we’ve all experienced. He’s not simply a physical freak whos size is best exploited on a basketball court. He’s a pure baller who seemingly loves the same game I grew up with. And that game didn’t involve 6’10 guys swatting my shot to half-court. But, then again, it didn’t involve posses and diamond earrings, either.

I felt dirty dropping him out of the top 10, despite knowing he probably doesn’t belong in the top 20. I ended up deleting everything I had written and just sort of gave up. There was of course more to it than that:

1. My boss fell ill which led to a temporary promotion (while still doing my old job) and long hours.

2. Writing wasn’t fun anymore.

3. I spent a weekend in San Francisco due to a friends’ wedding.

4. A vacation in Ocean Shores which coencided with The Wife’s birthday. Which explains why I agreed to go horseback riding with a crazy one-legged guide who was hitting on a teenager the whole time and told me he knew of some guys who killed some other guys and threw them in the bay.

Did you know that if you are on a horse and the horse starts peeing you are supposed to lean forward?

Scared Teenager’s Sister: “Ha ha your horse is peeing.”
Crazy One-Legged Guide: “Lean forward. …. I SAID LEAN FORWARD!!!”

The Wife later informed me that leaning forward eases the pressure on the horses bladder. Apparently this is common knowledge to every former Texan but me.

Speaking of the finer details of horse waste, did you know that when a horse defecates it basically inverts its rectum? Sorry. My horse was slow. Just be glad I didn’t search for an image link. You know you would have looked.

So I apologize for going AWOL and sincerely appreciate the requests to come back. Don’t let the nearly total lack of Spurs content in this post fool you; I will be watching every game and writing about the Spurs all season.

I have a lot of plans for this blog; some loose ends to tie up from last season. I will also be going through all my old emails and updating my links sections. I hope to add some features (Podcasts maybe?) and there may be some other surprises that will surely disappoint everyone but me. Suggestions are welcome, encouraged and FDA approved. And of course my thoughts regarding the additions of Van Exel and Finley will be coming later this week. (No, really, they will.)

Oh. Who took AI’s place in the top 10? Who else?

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All content copyright Matthew Powell 2005.